So, this is the kind of biker I am NOT.
-I am NOT the kind of biker that rides a Harley, has a big
burly mustache, wears a bandana and leather vest, rev’s their engine when
leaving a stoplight, and is perpetually frowning. No, this type can be slightly
intimidating and I have never been referred to as intimidating in my life.
Neither do I have an engine to rev.
-I am NOT the kind of Twin Cities biker that walks in to
Chipotle, orders, sits down, eats, AND uses the restroom…all while still
wearing their helmet.
-I am NOT the kind of biker that has a pretty rose-colored
bike with a wicker basket, wears skirts and delicate scarves, whose hair blows
in the wind, and is perpetually smiling. It’s difficult for me to smile while
pedaling up hills and my bike is blue and yellow (yes, as in Swedish colors.)
-I am NOT the kind of biker that wears gloves and spandex
with cool logos and bright colors that all match their shoes and don’t stop at
stop signs and treat their bike like their eldest child and like to speed past
the poor souls on their blue and yellow bikes who just haven’t gotten quite up
to speed yet.
Anyway.
May I walk you through the decision process I have been
taking the last few months regarding my future? I’m slightly proud of myself
for really taking my time on this decision. I mean REALLY taking my time. As
in, it’s been a reaaaaally long time. I decided I didn’t want to put words in
God’s mouth and say, “I think He’s calling me here or there” without being 100%
sure. You know, it’s slightly exhausting to constantly being weighing the
options in the back of my mind, and feeling the heaviness of having to commit
one way or the other, especially since with every decision stem ten more small
ones. But I’m NOT anxious about it.
You may remember last time when I was talking about
Moody. All the doors seemed to be leading to there. I applied and got accepted,
which is an honor and a blessing. I could get my degree, be in Chicago (closer
to my wonderful family,) be in a conservative Christian education environment
(without the average Christian education prices,) and get some good experience.
HOWEVER. Here I am, in the Twin Cities, surrounded by
diversity. I’m already teaching an English class to Spanish-speakers, which has
opened up SO many opportunities and connections. There is an opportunity to
work with a Hispanic church. Several girls from church are getting a house
together and happen to have extra space. I have learned a lot about ministry,
leadership, the Spirit, and reaching out to others through my time in Ecuador,
the apprenticeship I’ve been involved with at my church, and from Jean. What is
better education than hands-on experience? I feel called into ministry, and
time is short. We need to be VERY deliberate and intentional with how we spend
our time AND money…it almost seems selfish to go to school. Especially at a
school where my new growth spurts in the gifts of the Spirit might be less than
encouraged? If I put on my “eternity vision” lenses, what would be the most
beneficial to others around me? As the youth pastor at my church once said,
“God’s dream for your life is for others, not just for you.” I know I can
glorify God in any city, any country, any planet. I know He is with me to the
end of the earth. I can serve Him in the classroom, in the desert, in the
kitchen, in the janitor’s closet, in the jungle, in the snow, in the air, in
the mountains, on the rooftops, in a cave. But what is His BEST for me? I want
to be ON FIRE for Him. I want to be where He is working.
As you can see, I am leaning towards staying in Minnesota. I
have been praying about starting a summer “Digging into the Word/Praying in the
Spirit/Discipleship AND Evangelistic” Bible study with the BCF 20-something
females. I want to continue tutoring my English students through the summer.
Cristo Vive camp is coming up quickly. I am so excited to spend a couple weeks
with my family. I love to spend time with Jean and am grateful for having time
with her and HER family. How is there time for school right now? I understand
it’s important... I did apply to take some online courses and there are lots of
programs for getting TEFL/TESOL certified, especially here in the Cities.
So, there ain’t no flipping of a coin to get past
this one. And I am trying not to be wishy-washy.
Praise God for His faithfulness.
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